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The Bacon Tree

Posted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 7:07 pm
by Keith Holman
Back during the days of the American Frontier, a westbound wagon train was lost and low on food. No other humans had been seen for days, and then the pioneers saw an Old Norwegian sitting beneath a tree. "Is there some place ahead where we can get food?"

"Vell, I tink so," the old man said, tventy miles down da trail issa small zettlement vith a general store, but I vouldn't go up dat hill und down de udder side to get dere, somevun tole me you'd run into a big bacon tree."

"A bacon tree?" asked the wagon train leader. "Yah, un bacon tree. Vould I lie? Trust me. Go around, doan go dat vay!"

The leader went back and teld his people what the Norwegian said. "So why did he say not to go by the most direct route?" a person asked. So he told them about the Bacon Tree.

Other pioneers said, "Oh, you know those Norwegian people - they aren't too bright to begin with, and might lie just for a joke"

So the wagon train went up the hill and down the other side. Suddenly, Indians attack them from everywhere and quickly massacred all except the wagon train leader who managed to escape and get back to the old Norwegian.

Near dead, the man shouted, "You fool! We went to our deaths to find the bacon tree that you spoke of! We looked, but there was no bacon tree, just hundreds of Indians who killed everyone but me."

The old Norwegian man held up his hand and says, "Oof-da, vait a minute." He quickly picked up an English - Norwegian dictionary and began thumbing through it. "Oof-da, I made zuch ah big mishtake! It vuzn't a bacon tree, it vuz a ham bush!!"

Posted: Sat Nov 05, 2005 3:34 pm
by RussBrentnell
Eeeeeeeewwwwwwww!!!!!!