19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity

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Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2005 2:25 pm
First Name: Russ
Last Name: Brentnell
Crew?: Combined and Gold
Which Years on Board: 1980-84
Special Crew?: Neither
Rate: mm1 (nuke)

19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity

Post by RussBrentnell » Thu Nov 03, 2005 6:28 pm

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With
Sunglasses On And Point Your Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They
Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise
Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If
They Want Fries with That.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once
Everyone Has Gotten Over their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For
Sexual Favors."

7. Finish All Your Sentences With "In Accordance With
The Prophecy."

8. dont use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Ask People What Sex They Are. Laugh Hysterically
After They Answer.

11. Specify That Your Drive-Through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And
Play Tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't
Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-Workers Address You By Your Wrestling
Name, "Rock Hard."

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!,
I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The
Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The
Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."


What's yor #20? Let's hear it. I like to do this:

#20. Scream at unsuspecting co-workers, "I'm a crackhead!! I wanna
see your butcrack!!!"

It's more effective if you shake convulsively while you're screaming.
Combined in the Yard/Gold crew, 80-84 M-Div

Ship's New Storekeeper 2017-

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